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Sunday, August 11, 2002

Open up and let go

I finished cleaning up the junk I pulled out of my closet. Several bags of trash went in the dumpster but most of it was old boxes and stryrofoam that I don't need anymore. I also have a couple bags of old clothes to go to the thrift store. I rearranged the livingroom so it's much more open, which makes me feel less cluttered. I want to throw away things I don't need anymore instead of this security obsession about maybe needing something after I throw it away. I notice that it's more things that would cost me money than things that have sentimental value since I pretty much have settled on my sentimental things, which aren't that many compared to many people.

It was after four when I left the apartments as I'd taken my time. It's nice to have a whole day to fuss around without having to go anywhere. At four I left for church. That's another thing I like about the M3M service as I always felt pressured to get up and go to church on Sunday morning when I wanted to just take my time and have brunch and coffeee and read a little. Church in the evening is so much more civilized and I don't buy the idea that we need to suffer when we worship.

Once again I enjoyed the service and actually talked to a couple more people before I slipped away. I find it difficult to just start talking to people even when I want to get to know them. I stopped at the supermarket on the way home so the sun was just down as I rode home. What a nice time of day. I always am glad when I'm riding my bike or walking at that time of day as you just don't feel the beauty of the dusk when you're in your car. Especially, when it's been hot, like today, and the temps are going down quickly till it's only warm but what a welcome relief.

Summer at Dusk

The heat follows the sun over the hills
And the air breathes a sigh of relief.
The softness of the air without the hard sun
Let's go of the heat and we sigh with relief.
Between day and night there's a magic time.
A time when we open our eyes and smile.
When we open our hearts and let hope in.
When the world holds it's breath and time stops.
Then the night comes and we move on
But we remember the dusk and the hope and the magic.

Rachel Aschmann 2002.
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