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Tuesday, February 6, 2001

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Bread and circuses

I can't believe that 250 people want to wtch Timothy McVeigh's execution. What next? Bread and circuses? Why don't we just have him torn apart in a stadium by wild animals? How about having prisoners fight each other to the death? We could have Clinton as emperor. He's good at orgies. I pity the people who have to watch an execution. I dislike people who want to watch an execution.

I realize they have lost loved ones and all that, but to not just want someone deliberately killed, but to want to watch it happen is sad. Sure, tell the kids that it's ok to kill. Of course, we then expect them to discriminate between who we should kill and who we shouldn't. When I was a kid I didn't want to kill the people society said were bad, I wanted to kill the people who were hateful to me, who excluded me. So did McVeigh, and he did. Why should we expect kids to know the difference. I think that when kids watch adults, society, approve of killing that it is much worse than a movie with violence.

The lady I work with had to take off suddenly for a funeral and I had to change rhythm suddenly. It'll give me a chance to come in a little later the next few days but I'll have to work till five on Friday. That is going to kill me. Hmm, I used kill when I really mean it's going to be hard. We not only kill unappropriately, we use the word kill unappropriately. I often think about coming in later but do not want to give up my Friday afternoons. Still, since I haven't been sleeping well lately, an extra hour sure sounds good.

I messed something up and haven't been able to get the Weather Channel the last few days. I like knowing what the weather will be like, even when it's going to be the same. When it's changing, like now, it's very frustrating to not get it. All I could get was the channel listing and I thought they'd changed everything around and hadn't gotten around to find the new channel number. Well, it's the same channel number so I finally called the cable company and they did reset me and now it works. So cool! It's interesting how a little thing like that can cheer me up.

The middle finger on my left hand has been bothering we for at least a week now. It doesn't hurt most of the time and I can't see anything and I don't remember hurting it, but when I type I have to be very careful to hit the key with the ball of my finger or it hurts. It also hurts when I rub lotion on my face and bend my finger just a bit. There are so many things I have found out that I do with the flat of my finger so that it pushes it against the bend, and hurts. I'm typing with my fingers hight and curved, like I was taught in typing class, lo those many years ago. My teacher would be so proud of me.

A comment was made on the radio today about how poor people have the right to hate rich people and take away what they have. I'm poor. I've always been poor. I've never hated the rich. All the rich people that I know got rich by working twelve to eighteen hours a day to get ahead. I'm not about to. I'm not saying that rich people are all nice people, but I've known a lot of really crappy poor people too and it wasn't because they were poor but because they were just hateful people. I wish I had money but I don't feel anyone owes it to me. I figure I'll be working till I die since I have no money saved and am trying to pay off bills. I finally have a retirement plan, and I am grateful for that, but it's not going to make me rich either.

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Rachel Aschmann 2001.
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