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Friday, October 20, 2000

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Age and money

Age and money, they're both upsetting me today. I love my cat but every time I think I'm going to actually get my credit cards down something like this comes up. I wouldn't have done any differently but I feel a bit depressed. Then my friend, who is a year older, sends an email that she now qualifies for Dennys senior discount. In a way I look forward to getting senior discounts but it is another reminder of how much I wanted to do I haven't done.

What's sad is I have done a lot but it's no where near what I wanted to do, hoped to do, planned to do. I feel poor and old so I got some good mysteries to read. There's nothing like realizing that I'm still alive to make me feel better.

I have a feeling I'm going to need a refill on cat's antibiotic. I seem to dribble more down her chin than in her mouth. Hopefully she cleans herself good, but we shall see. She's not happy with me and doesn't want me picking her up since too many times that I have in the last week she's gotten medicine or been taken to the vet and deserted. Just left with strangers!

Part of feeling down was that I was so tired last night and still feel a little of it today even though I went to bed early. I'll be ok in a day or two but I get depressed when I don't have the energy I want. Is this more or getting old? Not having the energy you used to have? I hope not and I see old these old people zipping around like 20 year olds. I expect it's an attitude thing and I need an attitude adjustment and more sleep.

The high today was 79 and the highs for Saturday and Sunday are suppose to be 81 and 72. How lovely. It was sunny today so it felt warm but the forecast shows cloudy for this weekend so it should be very nice. I plan to go for a nice bike ride and enjoy the weather. I stopped at the library and picked up a book on bike repair my bike is acting funny. You know, it's making funny noises and the wheel is wobbly and so forth. I have some bike tools but I've never done much bike repair except to change a tire and oil the chain. I'm going to try and do my own bike tuneup which may take several weekends at the speed I do tuneups.

I would like to take longer rides, maybe an overnight at Catalina State Park or over by the Desert Museum but I worry that something is going to break and I'll be stuck. If I can tune the bike up myself I'll feel better. I want control. Yep!

Friday night television is not a good night and I'm tired of watching the news and hearing about Israel or the presidential race. I think I'll turn off the tv and read a book.

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(c) Rachel Aschmann 2000.
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