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Sunday, July 2, 2000

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Same Sex Marriage

I'm glad that Vermont now allows same sex marriages. I wish all states would. Now my problem with any marriage is that they are too easy to get out of now. Marriage is a contract a couple makes with the state and the state gives them special privileges because people who are committed to each other make a more stable society. In return the state and society give the couple special benefits.

I think too many people look on marriage as another quickie in life, hey if you don't like it you just walk away. I think they should go through counseling before they go into marriage and go through counseling before they can get a divorce. The one exception to divorce would be if there is any violence in the marriage and then the one at fault should be charged with assault.

Hey if married people get special benefits that I don't get, I want them to truly earn it. I don't want them to just use marriage as a convenience or another experience to have. I don't even mind multiple marriages as long as people have to think about it before they get into them or get out of them. Otherwise, why should they get benefits that I don't get. I'm still pissed at a remark made by one person at one of my jobs (and an attitude from many people) that I don't need to make as much money because I didn't have a family to support. Excuse me, I had kids to support. What were they? Toys? Disposable?

But back to gay marriages, I fully support their being able to get married. It was sad to see on the news today that people in Vermont are already protesting this. I do not understand this deep fear of gays. So the gay guys (who are so cute!) prefer a guy to me, well a lot of heterosexual guys prefer another gal to me. What's the difference? I also figure that we are all to some extent bisexual, but most people just can't accept that side of themselves, and that's fine, but they shouldn't brutalize and marginalize people who do accept it. There are also a lot of gays that won't accept their heterosexual aspects, of course.

Then there are people like me who haven't had sex in years, with anyone, but I figure that's because I am such a bad date. I have no clue as to how to flirt or how to read a guy (never tried a girl, I must admit), and I don't laugh at their jokes at the right time, and, worst of all, I am not going to go to bed with someone on the first date, or the second or third. I know I've missed out on a lot but I have also never been raped, or even close to it, beaten up, etc. I take enough chances waiting at the bus stop after dark. Most of all, I've never wanted to have sex with someone I didn't care about and it takes a while for me to allow someone to get that close to me.

It has been so hot that I've pretty much vegetated this weekend. I did read one book yesterday, "The Dry Season" by Peter Robinson. This is a very good police procedural. The detective, Detective Chief Inspector Alan Banks, investigates a skeleton found in a village that was drowned by a reservoir decades before and is only now drying up due to a drought. This is a very good plot and nicely done with flashbacks. The only part I disliked is that Banks is shown as someone for whom nothing works out right in his life. For whatever reason this grated on me as it didn't sync with his personality. I really don't care for police procedurals where the smart detective is shown as being persecuted and put upon. Come on! If he's that good it will be noticed.

I am also reading "The Cousins War", which I have been reading off and on for several months now, "The Zuni Enigma", "The Forest" and "Thursdays Child has far to Go". This is what a short attention span does to me. Mysteries or even light novels I can usually go right through but I read them fast. Anything that is non-fiction or heavier fiction takes a while. I think this is one reason that I've always had trouble with the classics as they are heavy reading due to not only having to struggle through archaic writing styles but also heavy topics.


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(c) Rachel Aschmann 2000.
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