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Monday, April 10, 2000

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Running Late

Today started off with whimper. I was moving slow to begin with and headed out on my bike later than usual. Halfway there I tilted my bottle back for a sip of coffee and poured the whole bottle of coffee down the front of my tshirt. This was more than I could just mop up in the ladies room, so I turned around and rode back home.By the time I got home, changed clothes and caught a bus I was half an hour late to work.

The day continued along the same lines. I dropped things, forgot things, stood there with a stupid look on my face because I forgot what I was going to do. There are days like that. I guess I was still recovering from the weekend. Sunday I felt better than Saturday afternoon but other than going to the grocery store, I spend the day relaxing at home and trying to recover.

I walked over to the Food Coop after work. It's so nice to have light in which to do things after work. In the winter it's so dark that I feel like I should just go home and get ready for bed. It wasn't too warm either so I enjoyed the walk.

Both my kids are coming for my mom's memorial next week which I'm glad of. They are so sweet to do this. I wish I had known my grandparents. I wish I knew how they influenced my parents, especially my mother. My mother never talked about the feelings she had for her parents and I wish I knew more of what her childhood was like.

I keep trying to write about my childhood but it's hard. It sounds so cut and dried - I did this, we lived there, I went here. I can't get the essence of what I remember. Is it possible to get the essence of our remembrances? Is it possible to tell other people anything but a pale, bowlderized imitation of what our fears and joys were?

Dad wants us all to tell an anecdote of Mom but I can't think of a concrete anecdote. When I think of my Mom I don't think of anecdotes but of a view of her. I remember incidents but none of them seems to be a good anecdote to tell about her. I hate stuff like this.

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4/9/00 - Biked - 1 miles
4/10/00 - Walked - 1.5 miles
Biked - 3 miles

(c) Rachel Aschmann 2000.
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